COUNCILLOR FORCED to RESIGN
After an extensive investigation lasting MANY minutes, elected
Councillor and much loved local carer, Marigold Fury, 73, was
forced to resign - after it became apparent she had failed to
adhere to strict new self-enrichment protocols mandated by
Lincolnshire County Council.
IMPROVED VIEWS of CAR PARK
Visitors to Stamford's cattlemarket car park will FINALLY be able to see their
car from the meadows - when later this week ALL the trees bordering the river
and meadows will be felled - following single complaint from visitor.
Who luckily was a tree surgeon (Timbercide of Crowland).
WALLY CUSTARD to PERFORM at GRAND OPENING
After being away for exactly 5 years, Wally Custard is BACK
and will be showcasing his topical brand of cheeky toilet
humour at the newly renamed Flemish Enslaver. Never shy of
controversy, Wally loves nothing better than poking fun at our
continental cousins.